Thursday, July 29, 2010


Earlier today I saw this video clip and as I watched the man at the chalk board, the person I actually saw was me. What about you, who do you see?

What are you clenching so tight in your fist today?

Is it worthy of your sweaty grip? Really?

Are you ready to uncurl every single thing that squeezes your heart?

Are you willing to let go so that you can let God in?

Sometimes the sin and shame and guilt and unforgivenss become so much a part of us that we no longer recognize them as not belonging. Did you get that? Not belonging. I carried my sin and shame and guilt in not only clenched hands, but in a clenched heart. It is true, the more I clenched my heart, the less I let out.

But the contrary is also true. My unyielding grip to my unsurrendered secrets also prevented God's healing and renewing from coming in.

God, who made the world and everything in it, since He is Lord of heaven and earth, does not dwell in temples made with hands.
Nor is He worshiped with men’s hands, as though He needed anything, since He gives to all life, breath, and all things.
And He has made from one blood every nation of men to dwell on all the face of the earth, and has determined their preappointed times and the boundaries of their dwellings, so that they should seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us...
~ Acts 17:24-27 (NKJV)

Sin and shame and guilt and unforgiveness do not belong to you. Friends, it is time to open your fist and join hands with someone in prayer. Friends, it is time to open your heart and mind so Christ's redeeming blood can freely pump through your entire body, cleansing you from the inside out.

...the very points on which you refuse to surrender will become "enemies" that rule over you...

For those of us who are followers of Christ, any resistance to the will of God will keep us from enjoying and abundant life and will create barriers in our fellowship with God.

Christian surrender means that a person lifts his or her hands and says to God, "Here I am; You take over; I belong to You!"

~ Nancy Leigh DeMoss; Surrender,
book included in A Revive Our Hearts Trilogy
entitled Brokenness, Surrender, Holiness;
Moody Publishers, 2008

What about you, did you see your reflection in that video clip? I pray it was in the part of unclenching.

Let us humbly pray:
Father God, we come before you this day with obedience to Your will for each of our lives. And in doing so we ask that You help us open our hands and hearts and minds so we can trade our burdens for Your freedom and Truth and forgiveness and love. We want to live surrendered lives that bring glory to Your name. Lord, I ask that you give each of us the strength to do so. In Jesus' name, amen.

* Please, check out these posts by Jennifer, one of our Healing Hearts, Renewing Minds sisters.
Also, stop by here with Lelia for more insight on Jennifer & Lelia's current book study, Surrendering the Secret.

* For my story and to see how God placed this ministry on my heart, please go here.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Silence & Secrecy

"Over the years,
as we learn to live in silence and secrecy,
many of us end up with a large stockpile of hurts
that we've buried deep inside ourselves."

~ Pat Layton, Surrendering the Secret: Healing the Heartbreak of Abortion,
Lifeway Press, 2008, p. 30



Those two things will rot you from the inside-out. But like me, maybe you think you will be okay, just as long as you can keep stuffing it down and burying it. Let me tell you, that does not work. Not at all.

What's interesting is that the unresolved things (be it an abortion or abuse or neglect or substance abuse) actually attract more hurt. For me, I had issues of not being heard in connection to my teenage abortion. So, from fourteen years old and on, I was tormented with misconceptions and lies that no one wanted to listen to me. That no one thought what I had to say was important. That no one thought I was worthy enough to hear.

Oh how we attempt to hide in blankets of silence and try to smother the reality of our past in vows of secrecy. But in doing so, we still carry those lies with us into relationships and marriage. Those secrets somehow morphed into lies. And those lies seeped into our heads and hearts as reality. Ugh. What a crazy cycle. It is no wonder women (and men) have a hard time in surrendering their secrets. The secrets get so entangled and ingrained that it becomes difficult to discern fact from fiction.

How I interpreted almost every single thing someone said or did to me, was filtered through those rotten, ratty blankets. What came out on the other side was tainted heavy with lies. My basis for me as a daughter, wife, sister, and friend was wrought with lies and misunderstandings. Even though I may have looked fine on the outside, inside I was a mess. My relationships were a mess.

Then I met Jesus and asked Him to be the Lord of my life. But I still kept secrets. And I still kept silent. Why and how would He forgive the mess I had made? When I had no place else to look, but up, He worked miracles and sent women into my life to help me surrender. Surrender it all.

Although others held my hands and my heart and showed me His Truth in my Bible, I learned that God is the only One could untangle those blankets of shame and guilt and unforgiveness.

He was and still is the One who can take those stockpiled hurts and change them into mounds of grace.

And heaps of love.

And piles of forgiveness.

For you were once darkness,
but now you are light in the Lord.

Walk as children of light
(for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness,
righteousness, and truth),
finding out what is acceptable to the Lord.

And have no fellowship
with the unfruitful works of darkness,

but rather expose them.
~ Ephesians 5:8-11

Friends, you must let Him in your house. If you are tired of suffering in silence and secrecy, fling open the front door to your heart. And invite Him in!

When I met Him at the cross and surrendered my secret, the foundation of who I thought I was and the foundation of how I based my self-worth came tumbling and crumbling down. In its place, God built a new house. As that stockpile of lies were incinerated, He filled my rooms with Truth. Now my foundation is strong. My walls are solid.

Please, check out these posts by Jennifer, one of our Healing Hearts, Renewing Minds sisters.

And stop by here with Lelia for more insight on the current book study, Surrendering the Secret.

Let us humbly pray:
Father God, please touch each one reading this today. If they are suffering in shrouds of silence and secrecy, give them strength to seek You. Give them direction to find someone who will support them on their journey of surrendering it all into Your hands. Bless each one with all that they need to build their foundations on Truth and love and mercy. In Jesus' name, amen.

For my story and to see how God placed this ministry on my heart, please go here.

Thursday, July 8, 2010


Do you believe these statements I gleaned from my Bible the other morning?

But this Man,
after He had offered one sacrifice
for sins forever,
sat down at the right hand of God.

For by one offering
He has perfected forever
those who are being sanctified.
(Hebrews 10:12 & 14)

Do you live like you believe those Words are true?

And what about the following words?

But the Holy Spirit also witnesses to us;
for after He had said before,

“This is the covenant that I will make with them
after those days, says the LORD:
I will put My laws into their hearts,
and in their minds I will write them,”
then He adds,

Their sins and their lawless deeds
I will remember no more.”

Now where there is remission of these,
there is no longer an offering for sin."
(Hebrews 10:15-18)

Even though you know God tells only the Truth and your head believes these Biblical utterances, does your heart readily follow suite too?

Do you really believe that once you lay your sins at the foot of the cross, they are no longer yours to carry?

Have you heard of the poor man's restaurant trick referred to as the Dine-n-Dash?

Come with me, let's try it together.

I, the poor woman, and you the other poor folks, let's eat a feast (of forgiveness), then we will dash. We will run right out the door, dragging one another by tightly held hands, as we race to our car in the parking lot.

Wait a minute! Something is different here at the Divine Diner.

When we leave this particular eatery, we don't have to look over our shoulder in fearful expectation of the manager running after us, hollering, and demanding payment. No, quite to the contrary.

Guess what? We don't even have to beat feet or make haste in our departure.

Actually, The Boss would prefer we stay, meal after meal.


Because His Son already paid the bill. He even tipped the waitress.

Friends, His Words are true. And they are ever-so-filling. Ya know, like the stick-to-your-ribs wholesome food that your mamma used to make to fill your always-starving teenage stomach? Yeah, like that. God wants to fill you up just like that.

Go back and re-read the scripture above.

Now, do you believe those Words with your head and heart?

You should.

God does not hold onto bills. He doesn't keep I.O.U.s in a neat little stack. Once you come to His Divine Diner, you actually hand Him the receipt of your lifelong sin list before you sup of His meal of forgiveness. Once you eat, you are free. But God knows that these sins like to noodle their way back into your head and even your heart. So, look up. See that neon flickering sign? Yeah, His diner is open 24-hours.

See you there.

I will be the one, licking my plate clean.

Let us humbly pray:
Father God, thank You for your platefuls of mercy and forgiveness. Thank You that we can dish up helping after helping. Lord, please be with each one reading this today. If there are still sins they are dragging around, give them the strength and peace to finally hand them over to You. And to fully accept that You paid the price already. In Jesus' Name, amen.

* Please, consider joining hearts in a healing journey together through an post-abortion study, Surrendering the Secret. I will see you there. Prayers are already being sent heavenward for your healing, so if you haven't found Christ's forgiveness for an abortion, please stop by and pull up a chair...

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Before & After

Do the storms of your past still threaten you with tumult and fear and anxiety and ferocity?

Are you still riding the waves of those storms, barely hanging on for dear life?

Is your soul tossed and battered and bruised?

Are you ready for the calm?


We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed— 10 always carrying about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body.
~ 2 Corinthians 4:8-10

Then He said, “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.” And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire;
~ 1 Kings 19:11-12


" a flower that has absorbed the cool

and refreshing drops of dew

through the darkness of the night.

Yet just as dew never falls on a stormy night,

the dew of His grace

never covers a restless soul."

~ A.B. Simpson; Streams in the Desert: 366 Daily Devotional Readings
by L.B. Cowman,
edited by Jim Reimann; June 30 reading


Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.

~ 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

...and after the fire a still small voice.
So it was, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle and went out and stood in the entrance of the cave. Suddenly a voice came to him, and said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?
~ 1 Kings 19:12

Friends, did you pin-point calm's location? Yep, it is true, we cannot see the calm with our eyes, but we sure can feel the calm within our hearts and minds.

Whatever your storms, Jesus is right in the midst of them with you. He is merely waiting for you to tire of the storm-thrashing so He can speak with words that will lead you out of the raging rivers. And when His whispers of Truth do break through, climb onto the shore and run! Run straight to Him. He is waiting and His arms are open wide.

It is your turn. Yes, you.

Let us humbly pray:
Father God, so often we let the storms of life toss us until we don't even recognize our bedraggled and beaten selves. Let us breathe deeply of You, Your peace, Your healing and Your renewing. Let us be still so we can hear Your Truth and absorb Your drops of love and forgiveness and grace and mercy. In Jesus' name, amen.

* Please come over here to Lelia's place and see how you can join others as they come out of their storm too... Healing Hearts, Renewing Minds very own Jennifer will be there too!

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